My own battle with stress and why I want to help others.
I thought I would share my own battle with stress and why helping others has become so important to me.
A few years ago I was very stressed and that stress had been with me for years. Working in sales and always wanting to be top of my game it certainly came with a lot of pressure. I was a single mum with no support from my daughter’s dad and I was exhausted. LIfe wasn’t supposed to be this way I used to think.
I mean, I had bought my first house at 23 years old with my daughter’s dad and we had been really good together for years prior to that. We both strived for success.
How did my life end up like this?
Just before I turned 30, we spilt up forever. This was not a decision I had taken lightly. I was unable to cope with his drinking and terrible emotional abuse, which had become horrendous ever since the birth of my daughter.
That year was very hard on me. After we spilt I wasn’t able to keep up financially with the Business I had so I took a role in sales.
My life entailed of earning good money however as soon as it was earnt it would be spent. I suffered guilt as I wanted to always treat my Daughter. We would the best I could afford. I was trying to fill a gap.
MY HEALTH WAS A MESS
Several years back my health was a mess. I could break down and cry so easily and over something so silly. I constantly suffered from colds, sore throats, viruses. The mood swings I had were horrid, at times I was so snappy. I just wanted to curl up and rest but I couldn’t.
I wasn’t looking after myself at all and inside it felt that someone had died. The feeling of such sadness and loss was overwhelming and very hard to explain. It seemed no one close to me understood and I was always told to cheer up. Yeah, because I hadn’t thought of that.
When I started in sales I had a Nokia. All the phone was able to do was call and text and from memory, it had a couple of games. I didn’t have a laptop, I had a case with paperwork. How times have now changed, somehow I became contactable no matter when it was.
Work was so demanding at times all I was doing in the week was working. Waking up at early, being in front of the laptop at 6 am. My little light showing I was active to my company. Finishing work at 11 pm sometimes later with no downtime and just a microwave meal.
I was able to work smart with my diary planning, so how come I was so knackered and feeling so down?
Other nights I would come in tired from travels and pressures and all I wanted to do was to sleep or watch mindless tv. I wanted my brain to numb from the constant noise. With a glass of wine to get over the day, I thought to have evenings in front of the tv having a glass of wine was a normal night. It seemed lots of people I would speak too were doing the same.
Whilst talking to a LIne Manager once, I said “Did you know I got married” “Nooooo” came the reply. “Yes, I’m married to the job it seems” Dating was out of the question, not that anyone would understand. My work, life balance was so out of sync I literally laughed at the idea of dating on a weekday.
Weekends I was so tired. It became a chore to have to explain myself so I thought, stuff it, I’ll just stay single as I couldn’t be bothered with any grief.
One Sunday morning I awoke with terrible chest pains. It was a strange sensation if felt really cold in my heart and I was scared. I was scared so I called the Doctor service for advice. I was told I should get myself into the Accident and Emergency department pronto. Forget spooky stuff at Halloween, this was scary! Thing is this was not my first time where I had an issue and was told to go to Hospital.
Scared, alone until my family arrived my head was spinning. They did an ECG and all was okay. I was told about stress and to see my GP. The time before they said the same.
That was it! Enough was enough
My working life was my life. I put all of my energy into work but felt terrible inside. To others they would see my sales as successful and that I was being determined and focused. This lead to work and others putting more and more on me as they thought I would cope.
I wasn’t living I was just existing. My life involved trying so hard to please everyone. I was trying to make up for my daughter’s dad’s absence too.
I found meditation and this was a game changer for me. This let me breathe and when you feel like your drowning, to have some air is exactly what’s needed.
At first, it would just help me to fall asleep. I was meditating at night whilst laying down. However, I was able to get a great night’s sleep. This left me feeling refreshed. A good night’s sleep is essential to starting the day right.
I found Tony Robbins online and I was so inspired. I would listen from time to time, each time I would I listen I was left feeling educated about my life and other peoples characters too.
Every morning whilst getting ready, I would listen to speeches, interviews, podcasts of very successful people, I started with Tony Robbins then I found Brian Tracy, Warren Buffet, Jim Rohn, Bob Proctor and many more. Some of these people who were not just millionaires but billionaires and they had helped others become successful too.
My life gradually started changing.
All these people made time for themselves. They had such busy lives but they would meditate, eat healthily, they were not burnt out messes. I listened every morning, every night and at any opportunity, I could. I was hooked. These people had become my mentors.
Life took on a new meaning for me. I started taking control and found ways to be happy.
I realised, I was carrying many negative beliefs and I was self-sabotaging myself. Each day that had passed I would listen and grab the snippets of advice that I found relevant to myself and started putting their advice in motion.
The first thing I did was to take full responsibility for my life. I was to stop comparing to others.
Sitting down I went over exactly what my 7 days entailed, where I was putting my time. Please see 5 ways to gain more time which I wrote.
I stopped the habit of watching soaps in the evening and started my own blog which allowed my creative side to spark. I was able to design, write, take my own photos and express myself so openly. This lead to my confidence growth.
Instead of everything revolving around investing in myself for work, I started investing in ME! The difference in me was quite noticeable. I had become a much calmer, clear-minded, compassionate person. The fire in my belly was still there but instead of it being a dangerous fire, this fire was igniting me in a different way. A good way!
FASCINATED WITH WELLBEING
I became fascinated with learning about wellbeing. Soaking up information which I would find intriguing about the brain, the body, and our soul.
Due to what had happened to me I knew only too well the effects stress can have on the body.
I took courses and would read books. One after another to learn as much as I could. I enjoy learning and I have developed an endless thirst for knowledge. This has become one of my daily rituals. I try to get my hands on as much knowledge reading self-improvement, non-fiction as possible. Currently, I get through 3-4 books a week.
If I can turn my life around and which has lead to feeling happy and content, you can too! This didn’t happen overnight but from my actions, I now feel so different.
I attract so many good things in my life now. Gone are the days where I believed I was a victim.
“I create the life I want now!”
Wellbeing has become my passion in life. I want to see others succeed and do well but in the right way.
I believe you should be able to live a good life and have the right job for you. Are you fulfilling your passion?
Depression and stress are becoming so recognised now in the workplace. Many companies are taking wellbeing in the workplace seriously. This leads to happier and more productive staff. Its shows there is less absenteeism and staff turnover too.
I have built my own company which helps people and companies with wellbeing. My business is called Master Your Life
Does your workplace provide help and support in wellbeing? Do you find your company takes wellbeing of the staff seriously?
I have put a link below if you are looking for support.